Oh Tuhanku.

I tend to read the Malay subtitles on TV. It's annoying but you can't ignore them neither. You'd be surprised how entertaining the translations can be. Few years back on an X-Files episode (ah yes, the days when watching TV brought meaning to my life), Scully was asking Mulder, "How do you kill it?" (referring to some monster thingy). Mulder replies, "The same way you kill a rabid animal."

Translation: "Seperti membunuh seekor arnab."

RABID, people, not RABBIT. Oh and also, in another episode, Mulder says, "I've always wanted a peg-leg."

Translation: "Saya inginkan kaki khinzir."

Yes indeed, Mulder has always dreamed of having a PIG leg. Another famous one is one of those war movies where a soldier throws a grenade and shouts, "Duck!" And yes, you guessed it, our trusty translators decide that it means, "Itik!" Quack, quack.

But most recently, the biggest boo-boo i've seen on Astro was on the Oprah Winfrey Show. Jim Carrey says to Oprah, "I don't want to talk about it anymore. No more. Period."

Translation (get ready for this): "Saya tak nak cakap tentang hal ini lagi. Tidak lagi. Menstruasi."
Oh. My. God.

Press be asking do I care for sodomy
I don't know, yeah, probably
I've been looking for serial monogamy
Not some bird that looks like Billy Connolly
But for now I'm down for ornithology
Grab your binoculars, come follow me
- Robbie Williams and Kylie Minogue, Kids. Translate THIS.