Thursday, March 09, 2006

Lazy ass.

I must get off my lazy ass. If they were giving out Olympic medals for procrastination, I would win the Gold hands down. No contest. I could do it with my eyes closed (in fact, most of the time that's exactly how I do it). I thank God for tomorrows. I never seem (seem being the operative word here) to run out of them. And when I finally do, I kick myself for procrastinating. Vicious cycle. Do I ever learn? Of course not. If i did, I wouldn't be writing this entry bitching about myself.

Here are the things I'm so good at putting a hold on:

1. My car - I love my baby, really I do. I love that she gets me from point A to point B with much fuss. I love her despite her scratches and bumps. However, I have to admit I take her for granted. As long as she's clean on the outside, I never really give her 'insides' much thought. My car has been making funny noises since July last year. Yes, people, July LAST YEAR. And eventhough I know its due for service, I keep saying, "It's still running fine. Tomorrow, tomorrow..." Fast forward to March 2006. That squeaking noise is no longer getting to me because, hey, it sounds like part of the car by now. In fact, I even turn down the radio volume some mornings just to see if the sound is still there. And then my brakes go funny, i get more squeaky noises and my car starts to veer to the right for no reason. Gee, you think it's time for a service? I end up forking RM300 to service my car and replace the shock absorbers. Tulah, dats why.

I kinda miss the squeaky sounds.

2. The magazine - I'm in charge of a tourism magazine. I make sure the stories and pretty pictures are there every month. I make sure the information is updated and the advertisements are correct. That's what I get paid to do. I live, eat and breathe the monthly Sabah Magazine. According to my production schedule, everything should be ready by the 15th of each month. SHOULD be. Again, I count on good ol' tomorrow. You know what really happens every month? I find myself pulling long hours writing and trust me, it's difficult to make a piece sound 'exciting' when all you is for the damn magazine to go to print pronto. Sometimes I feel my writing is affected and that sucks. And when that happens, I tell myself, "Next month, I'll do it sooner." Riiiiight.

3. Dental check-ups - When I have teeth growing out of my eyes and gums the colour of seaweed, I'll make that trip.

4. My Grand Plan - I'm trying to get out of KK. For a while. Maybe a year. I've got it all planned out. It's the execution that's not happening. Why? Because (all together now) there's still tomorrow. I have everything I need sitting on my table. Boring forms waiting to be filled. Phonecalls to make. Interviews to attend. E-mails to reply. Watch this space.

Today. Today I will start making things happen. Be it one baby step at a time. I have to leave. I am losing my heart in so many things here and before I begin to resent everything around me, I must leave. Perhaps the only way I can begin appreciating what I have is to leave them for a while. I don't expect the grass to be greener on the other side. But I do long for a change of scenery.

Oh crap...I just realised my car insurance and road tax expire today. Ok la, I'll get them renewed.


No comments: