Not ready.

I couldn't do it. I was on the verge of taking a bold step to move to KL but I retracted my application last night. I even got the phone interview in the bag and if that went well, I was to fly to KL in the next couple of weeks for the real thing.

But I couldn't do it. There were many reasons why. My friends were telling me I would be crazy to give this opportunity up. Maybe they're right. The money is good and it might just catapult my career into something bigger. Imagine the big city life! The parties! Meeting up with old college friends.

If this was so great, how come I didn't - couldn't - feel the excitement? Where was the anticipation? The stars in my eyes and all that jazz? Nada. My gut was telling me this wasn't right. No matter how I tried, I couldn't grasp the notion of moving to KL now and being happy with the decision.

Eventually, I do plan to leave KK for a bit, just to ensure my career doesn't get stuck in a rut. And other reasons which will be revealed at a later time. But right now, it's a matter of the right place, wrong time.

I'm not ready to leave home.