Monday, December 04, 2006

Plan B

I spent the weekend jungle-trekking for 5 hours but i'll blog about that later.

I dunno how much longer I can do this. The chances get bleaker and bleaker and I'm starting to give in to the fact I won't be spending Christmas and the New Year with my other half who is on the other side of the world.

I am upset. Plain and simple. But like a captain of a sinking ship, instead of going "Oh woe is me!" and going down with my vessel without a fight, least I can do is look for a rescue boat or a life vest right? So it's time for Plan B. I'm not even gonna imagine how much money I'm gonna spend on Plan B but hey, i've come this far and we'll see what happens.

You know what is most tiring in this whole ordeal? The yo-yo emotions. One moment everything seems to go as planned and five hours later, you get the rug pulled from under your feet. And then tomorrow, you get another phone call to tell you,"Wait, I think we might have this sorted out..." And the day after, "Looks like the embassy still needs more documents..."

So what's a girl to do? Do I forget about my whole trip? I have three weeks of annual leave approved but since I'm not going anywhere, should I just come back to the office?

This Friday, I should be on a plane on the way to spend a white Christmas with my Cubby. Instead, I will most likely wake up and make my way to the office.

I try to listen to everyone's advise on 'looking on the bright side...' or 'He'll be back soon' etc. But I don't think anyone really understands that no matter how much positive thinking I try to incorporate into my life right now, it doesn't take away the dissapointment and frustration I feel.Can you really expect me to throw my hands in the air and say, "Aww shucks, that's just too bad. But on the bright side, the sun is still shining." Bollocks. And you know it.

"If it makes you happy, it can't be that bad.
If it makes you happy, then why the hell are you so sad?"
-Sheryl Crow crowing on my mp3 player.

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