Because she says things I already know but need to hear. Because her timing is flawless. Because her words are the kindest cruellest things that hit home - hard. Because she is a complete stranger yet the only person who seems to understand what you're going through right now. Because she is the kind of writer I aspire to be. But most of all, because she is ultimately right:
Just because one person doesn't think you're right for them doesn't mean you need to change. It doesn't mean you're broken or damaged. It doesn't mean you aren't good enough or that you're some failure. It's ONE PERSON. I know you thought he was "the person." But he's not. He's a person. And so are you... your own person. You need to take care of her now. No one died and made him God. Your desperate, "I'll change all those things you wanted me to" attempts need to stop. You want to change something, then change your perspective. Figure out what led you here, and learn from it. Yes, you have shit to work on. We all have things to work on, and with the next person there will still be things to work on, sometimes the same things, sometimes all new anxieties or issues bubble to the top. It's never going to be perfect, but it's not supposed to leave you feeling like shit more than you're feeling like "the shit."
From 'Advice is What You Want When You Already Know The Answer', by Stephanie Klein, October 27, 2008.
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